New Beginning

It has been 2 weeks since I started my new job. I would say kinda cool interesting job.

At least it would not be so deskbound compare to my previous one..

After 2 years with the previous job, I would say life is pretty stagnant. I am so comfortable with the previous job that I find it is kinda scary. I am getting lazier I would say. This is because when you do a task for so many times, you know the loops and holes to get your way around it. If I am to stay on, I may not want to leave at all.. Why? Plain lazy.. cause I can get things done with my eyes closed! Simple as that...Life is so stagnant. I find that there are nothing much to learnt at all. All I can say, there are not much left for me there.

Now, things are so different.. With this new job, there are practically everything are new to me..

Things I want to learnt :-

1. How to use Adobe Photoshop, Ilustrator, Imageready and whatever got to do with Adobe

2. Photoshooting session

3. Colour separation - till now I have really no idea what the heck it is..

4. Event management - I had done this a couple times, I want to do more...

5. Press release

6. Joint promotion

Now on my hand, there are actually 3 major projects which I am given to start.

1. Screen TV advertising in Bukit Bintang

2. SMS Advertising

3. Cinema Advertising...

It is my first to experience a life recording radio advertising in my life, which I find kinda cool. 30 sec radio advertising in My FM and 98.8 FM...

It is also my first to experience a life photoshooting....

Awesome!!

Timeless

It had been 2 months since I last wrote on this blog... Let's see what had happened :-

1. I just started to continue my studies now.. 1 Long dragging year. I would not say it is easy course as I have to do 5 to 6 assignments every 2.5 months. I would prefere the one which I had took in Singapore initially. The course was twice a week with 2 assignments every 2.5 months. This course needs me to attend 3 times per week! Damnation!! Assignments are very time consuming. I had to work in the middle of the night to rush for the dateline.. Slept for 2 hours and rushed for 3 hours. It is killing me. I wonder how long will I able to last before I colapse......

2. I had been going out with guy friends here and there, I kinda like the attention they are showering me.. reminds me of sweet 16 where guys start to ask you out for dates. This never happened to me as I was from a gals' school. Therefore things like this never happened to me. No interesting prom night or such. It's fun dating time now!

3. I had not been going to gym that often anymore compared to last time.. Kinda miss my gym gang. It is only weekends that I am trying to make my time for...

4. I started to gave tuition to a Standard 1 year boy. 2 hours once per week.. Kinda cute but very naughty boy. Clever and smart I would say. I will teach him English and Malay. The mother had just approached me last week to teach her 5 /6 year old daughter as well. 1/2 hour to begin with then gradually increase to 1 hour to help her with Malay!! Gosh where am I suppose to find the time in the world???

I need more time now.....

Illness

Last week, it has been a horrible week. I had been down with a fever for 3 days.. Till now I had not fully recovered from it yet.

Now, it will be coughing and coughing..

I gotten 3 days mc for the fever, fainted in the clinic once while waiting for the nurse to dispense the medicine. Shucks! Thank god, my dad was around to help me. Wheeled into one of the rooms, with a lot of chaos going round.. Recovered from the dizziness and went back home for medicine and rest.

I had not being going to the gym as frequently as I used to due to this fever. I had only been there twice last week and maybe once this week. My whole week schedule is packed with my recent part-time job. I felt guilty about it.

Anyway, I will be back for more gym classes next Monday to compensate on the loss.

Death

Today has been a very bad day.. Bad day as in the sense of bad luck.. I don't gamble or what knots.. but it is really bad..

On my way to the office driving... Yes, I know! I know... I have been driving almost everyday.....I came across a dead carcass.. a brown dog.. smashed with the head flatten, i presumed... Guts all jutted out with blood splurted on the road with clearly visible exposed reddished skin.... Goshed! IT is really disgusting!! Pity and sorrowful..

Not only this, after the dead dog, I came acrossed another carcass. This time is a brown cat, the tail was clearly visible... sheeeshed..

Then, it was last Friday I think.. it was a pigeon.. the head was gone, with the wings spread out flat on the road.. blood spluttered...

Maybe it is the Seventh Month caused a lot of animals accident...
No comment on it.. either the animals are careless, or the drivers are careless or it is their time to leave but in a horrible way....

Rest in Peace!

The end

I had given up on it. No initiative was taken from both. There is nothing more to say. Period.

Life is a lot easier to have it for your self rather than sharing it. Call me selfish if you want to but I couldn't care more. No more headaches, heartaches and sleepless nights.


A new beginning..

Driving

Today is the third day, I drove to work.. Maybe to any other people it is norm to drive to work but not for me. After obtaining my license since 1995, I seldom drive. It had been on and off thing, where I drove once or twice after I graduated from the driving school. I am very scared of driving, i can feel my heart thumpting very fast when I need to drive. My hands turn into icy cold. Iam phobia to drive.

Reason being that I had met an accident when I was 21 or 22. At that time I and a friend just are on the way back from visiting KLIA, at then, the airport was newly built. He was a new driver. Being new, when a white van accidently knock the back of the car, he was shocked and nervous. The car was skidded from left to right lane and from right to left. I was swing from left to right and right to left at that point of time. The car went up to the side pavement and hit the railings. The bonnet and the engine of the car were damaged badly due to the accident. Thank to god, both me and my friend were not hurt. It was a close shaved I would said.

After this accident, I had not been driving till lately..Thank god, I still got the guts to touch the wheel. Sometimes, I still break into cold sweats when I'm driving..

Hopefully, I would be able to conquer my fear of driving soon...

Driving phobia......

Life has been busy

Life has been pretty busy lately...I didn't blog lately.. Joining the gym had taken much of moi time. This leads the gym as my second home..

First home is the "office"
Second home is the "gym"
Third home is the "home"

I had been pretty active that I goes to gym almost every day for the past few months. I started slowly in February. The pace start to pick up in May. I do enjoy my classes. I'm glad that I had become the gym's member at least it take up most of my time. On the contrarary, I don't have to feel bored too... Besides that, I got to know more people there. Get to loose a few pounds, actually more than that. It is a great achievement especially after sweating out in classes like Bodystep, Bodycombat, Bodypump and RPM. What matters most is I love the classes there.. Phew .. Really can sweat it out...

Sooner or later I'm becoming exerciseholics...

New to Exerciseholics... Woo hooo

misintrepretation

I misintrepretated...

Well, life can be that bad .. I cannot imagine if it is really the truth.. I would called it imagination. The imagination is so torturing, what if it is the real thing.. I dare not think of the consequence.

I am trapped in the quicksand. It is too late to pull myself up.. I will wait till it slowly drained me out.

Souless

Love and Hatred

Yesterday night was a difficult night for me. I can't sleep. Tossed and turned throughout the nights.

Today, my feelings for the day had gone from bad to worst... I can feel my eyes swollen from the crying I had. The clouds are gloomy.. The sky look greyish to me.. Everything is so dull and unattractive..

Why must I torture myself??? After all the things I had been through for the passed days. Is it worth the trouble making myself so miserable.

There is mix feelings in me... A sec it is hatred burning in my eyes and another sec, my heart was aching.. How could such feelings exist?? I hate the hatred you had caused me. I hate my love for you as my heart is still there for you... Thinking of you. Hopes where I dare not believed in is still there in me. I pray hard with time can help me to unleash these feelings

Down with missing love. Down with hatred that instilled in me. Love and hate at the same time.

Something missing in life

It had been two days. It felt like 2 years. Time passed by very slowly.

I can feel the emptiness in me. There is something missing in me for the past two days. Tears come and go very frequently. It is a torture waiting. I had been checking my phone, hoping and hoping.. for something.....but still it is all but silence..


It is just the matter of getting used to the emptiness in my heart...I hope the torture will end soon...

No news

hmmm.. after for so many days. There is still no news from the company. I am pretty skeptical about my chances. Since I blew it up.. Anyway, will still be looking for opportunities out there.

I had also faxed a resume to the company next door, but no news from them yet. Hopefully I will heard from him soon.

It is not that I don't like the job I'm doing right now. It is just that I will be a new colleague coming into the department pretty soon and my salary sucks big time.. my boss is still bearable to tell you the truth but of course one will want both a good job and a good salary.

Ridiculous, right.

Carry my hopes high!

More Lies

At 11.45 am, I grab my handbag quickly and rushed downstair. I need to catch a interview at 12noon same place. I informed the receptionist that I am going to the bank. I received the call yesterday and asked to attend a second interview. In less than 5 minutes, I was in a cab heading to town.. Fancy sharing a cab with other people... I couldn't be bother as I was rushing for time..

Back to the story, I reached in time. I attended the interview. I did badly in the interview.. He asked a lot about marketing questions but I was speechless. I don't seems to impress him. Pretty blew up.. I could said.

Before finishing the interview, he passed a list of questions/ scenarios for me to answer.. It is difficult.. I didn't finished up the questions. I thought some excuses saying that office need me urgently, I got to go.. funny. I can cracked out a excuse like that...

After saying thank you to him, I called her, asked to her whereabouts as it is lunch hour, and my stomach is rumbling. To think about it, maybe I am hungry that's why I can't think...

Lied again, I went to the bank to settle some stuffs....


Never heard from the company anymore.....

Lies

It is a Friday afternoon, and after lunch with my colleague. I asked her to drop me off at the side of the road so that I can get to town to do a errand for my boss. Actually, it is for a interview. Of course without her knowledge, as she is the company's Human Resource Manager. I won't tell her that I'm heading to town for a interview. I told her that I need to go to town to run some errands for my boss. It was a lied. I had to attend for a interview in a company's for a Marketing position. I reached town and look for the placed. It took me about 20 minutes to fill up the application form and I was called into the HR room for a interview. It went pretty well till my phone kept on ringing... It rang and rang non stop till I finished my interview, thank goodness it was on a silent mode. I was distracted through out the interview. I hope he won't notice it. It went very smoothly and I have to go for another interview to confirm and discuss for the final details. This is still to be advised.


My boss was the one calling me non stop. Frantically, I could said about 10 times. He is plain irritating. I called him and told him that I was not feeling well and was in the doc's room for the past half an hour. Imagine that, all this while I was attending a interview behind his back... ha.. ha..After the putting an end to the conversation, I received another called from the HR Manager. She asked me about my whereabouts.. Things are explained that I was on a errand to get things done for my boss. I gather that he called the office and was looking for me high and low searching everywhere for me. He make a big hoo has about it and scolded both the receptionist. He spoke t the HR Manager and asking for me. Geez..pain in the ass.


I went back to the office. I spoke to the HR Manager, complaining about my boss.. being boss asking me going out to do his errands but forgets all about it as usual. Complaints and complaints ... non stop... ha ha


I got a cheek to lie to my boss and her.

The meaning

A misterious gal is in my boss's office... who is she? She is young and moderate looking gal. While I am busy wondering who is she, my boss calls me into his office. She is so and so. She will be joining our team. Smilling, I shake my hand with hers, but deep inside my heart it is like a knife is stabbed into my heart.

Who is she? How come I never heard anything about anybody joining the department. What does she has that I don't have? Will she be taking over my job? Hundreds and thousand unanswered questions? I felt so insecure. I am dispensable to the department... Poof.. I woke up. And realise it is a dream. The uneasiness is still there, but i tried to get back to my sleep as today I still need to go the office.

What does the dream meants?

New arrangement

No news from the interview. So looks like I have to stay on with what I'm currently doing.

As I had determine to stay on with the job, my boss had made some special arrangement. To bring in a new colleague. What a disappointment. All the hard work is flushed down the toilet bowl for the whole year. He is going to be the asst manager. What a joke! But that's the reality and I have to face it.

All the emotion turmoil rumbled in my head for the whole weeks. It has been a shitty week. Have been thinking to change job, but I like what I am currently doing. I had asked around for opinion and most common advise is the "wait and see position".hmmm....

So I shall wait and see till this end of March...



Disappointed with the arrangement