Friday, March 25, 2005


I misintrepretated...

Well, life can be that bad .. I cannot imagine if it is really the truth.. I would called it imagination. The imagination is so torturing, what if it is the real thing.. I dare not think of the consequence.

I am trapped in the quicksand. It is too late to pull myself up.. I will wait till it slowly drained me out.


Monday, March 21, 2005

Love and Hatred

Yesterday night was a difficult night for me. I can't sleep. Tossed and turned throughout the nights.

Today, my feelings for the day had gone from bad to worst... I can feel my eyes swollen from the crying I had. The clouds are gloomy.. The sky look greyish to me.. Everything is so dull and unattractive..

Why must I torture myself??? After all the things I had been through for the passed days. Is it worth the trouble making myself so miserable.

There is mix feelings in me... A sec it is hatred burning in my eyes and another sec, my heart was aching.. How could such feelings exist?? I hate the hatred you had caused me. I hate my love for you as my heart is still there for you... Thinking of you. Hopes where I dare not believed in is still there in me. I pray hard with time can help me to unleash these feelings

Down with missing love. Down with hatred that instilled in me. Love and hate at the same time.

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Something missing in life

It had been two days. It felt like 2 years. Time passed by very slowly.

I can feel the emptiness in me. There is something missing in me for the past two days. Tears come and go very frequently. It is a torture waiting. I had been checking my phone, hoping and hoping.. for something.....but still it is all but silence..

It is just the matter of getting used to the emptiness in my heart...I hope the torture will end soon...